SEN. TOM COBURN

They call him "Dr. No."
Legislation he will slow.
Resources he can muster
To stage a filibuster
Which is a one-man show.

BAREFOOT RUNNERS

Runners of the barefoot kind
Really blow my mind.
But when you're striding down the road,
Shoes increase your load
No matter how well designed.

RAM

The Remote Area Medical Health Expedition
Is a nine-year Wise County tradition.
On the grounds of the county fair
People get free health and dental care
Who are in a can't-afford-it position.

FIGHTING AGING

Have I defeated aging?
No, but the war I'm waging.
I'm in my fighting mode
In the gym and on the road
Where the battle's raging.

BIGDOG

A dog that doesn't bark, huh?
What can you expect from DARPA?
Helpful is this pack animal
That is, in fact, mechanical
When you have no flying carpet.

AURORA BOREALIS

Scientists are shedding light
On the northern lights.
Integral to their scheme is
A satellite called Themis,
And important are its flights.

Magnetic explosions, they're pretty sure,
One-third the way to the moon occur.
To be specific, I recollect,
Magnetic bands reconnect
That stretched and broken were.

MOTORCYCLE PUZZLE

If you could behold
A motorbike remote-controlled
With no rider on the scene,
Into the curves would it lean?
(Its balance would it hold?)

TENDER FRIENDSHIP

In our modern society
It's nice that sometimes we
Can have a friendship tender
With one of the other gender
Who wedded to another be.

And a friendship tender
With one of the other gender
Is a real treat
When being sweet
And other traits commend her.

We have a tender friendship.
So life is a happy trip.
By e-mail we keep in touch.
We like this very much
'Cause we've no need for penmanship.

CURRY GAP TO BLACKHORSE GAP HIKE

The day being hot and hazy,
I knew I'd sweat like crazy
And my strength it would zap
Though I'd had my nap
And was fresh as a daisy.

When we stopped at Peaks of Otter,
I topped off my water.
Then we drove a middling way
South on the Parkway,
Glad it wasn't any hotter.

At Blackhorse, Patricia made us four.
Left her car, drove south some more.
At Road One-ninety-one
We began our fun
When Larry locked his door.

A mile after we sallied forth,
Finding the A.T., we headed north.
First there was a downgrade,
And I thought we had it made,
For what that is worth.

We had a peak
At Curry Creek
And let me say, "Oh my,
That creek was nearly dry!"
Uphill then, but we didn't streak.

Over the top, down once more.
This repeated till our feet were sore.
That's the universal tale
When you're on the trail
With its hills galore.

Blueberries there were to nibble,
Small but worth the trouble.
We didn't rely on them solely
As we ambled ever slowly,
Never marching at the double.

At Wilson's Creek we took a break.
Pools there were but not a lake.
On rocks that were right hard,
I set my pack down too hard,
Causing a Pepsi can to break!

Another break at Wilson Creek Shelter
While in the heat we sweltered.
Close to it
Is an old colliers pit
That made charcoal for smelters.

You know, of course,
That we stayed the course
And, by and by
As though young and spry,
We came out at Blackhorse.

CIVIL RIGHTS MEMORIAL

Virginia has a monument of quality
To its rocky road to equality.
Depicting the walkout of a bitter day,
Its dedication was announced Saturday.
On the capital mall it be.

PERCIVAL'S ISLE 5-MILER

In our various styles
We carried our bright smiles
'Cause, with health being blessed,
We were doing our best
Over five flat, shady miles.

MEN & WOMEN

Many men are swell,
But this is truth to tell:
Though, by and large,
Women are not as large,
I like them at least as well.

GET STARTED

This I do declare
About hard jobs everywhere:
Once you've made a start,
You've done the hardest part.
It's all downhill from there.

HELEN'S HAND

Had I asked her dad for her hand,
He'd have said "Hey, this is grand!
Oh, happy day!
Just don't delay.
That's what I demand."

THE OLYMPIANS

Fine specimens are they.
Is there some kind of way
Or something we can do
To look the way they do
And be as fit as they?

Yes, there is a way
To be nearly as fit as they
Even at the stage
We call middle age:
Train hard four hours every day.

BIG DOGS

About big dogs, I've this to say:
If you can't run with they,
If you're not as fast,
Or if you can't last,
On the porch you should stay.

"If you can't run with the big dogs, stay on the porch."

FLIRTING

I'd like to flirt
But no one hurt
Nor rules bend,
And with a friend
Not just any skirt.

MY WIFE

It brings me close to tears
To think of all the years
Me she's been training,
All the while refraining
From loving other dears.

SNOWSHOE

Let me tell ya, Snowshoe
Is a great place to go to.
If I may be candid,
The scenery there is splendid
And there are fun things to do.

MY DONNA FIX

Some days when I do my tricks
Everything just nicely clicks
And I feel I've had a head start.
This is due, at least in part,
To getting my Donna fix.

It comes in my e-mail.
But some days I look to no avail.
And to you I can attest
On those days I'm not my best
And I'm slower than a snail.

PRECIOUS POEMS

Once one learns,
Then later to them returns,
One takes pleasure
In great measure
In Thayer, Service and Burns.

LEGS

Boobs are nice,
And I may look twice.
But a fine pair of legs
My attention begs
Once spotted in a trice.

CHINA & TIBET

These scenes, you can bet,
We never will forget
From our trip in two thousand five
To see how people live
In China and Tibet.

REEL WOMEN

It's fun to go swimmin'
With webfooted women.
But it's more appealing
And I prefer to go reeling
With reel women.

KID-SICKNESS

With today's more involved parenting style,
During separation for just a little while,
Kid-sickness of the parent
Is more and more apparent
Despite electronic communication all the while.

HEAVY LIFT

Machine built to pull a train
Lifted by two husky cranes
And set down on a lorry.
Watching this great story
Were Sally, Dick and Jane.

WHITE-NOSE SYNDROME

On noses of bats among us
Grows a whitish fungus.
It's a symptom of a blight
That kills bats that fly at night
In numbers right humongous.

TROOP WITHDRAWALS

Should withdrawals have a time-table?
This issue is on the table.
Will we be hanging round
When conditions on the ground
Are much more stable?

DARA TORRES

Thank you, Dara Torres.
Yours exceeds the stories
Of Olympians before you.
We'll be cheering for you
As you swim to glory.

Thanks for your example.
Your strength is clearly ample.
At the age of one and forty,
You are so very sporty
That your rivals you will trample!

DUCK RACING

Here's diversion run amok:
The racing of the ducks.
Don't know if one's named Donald
Or from the farm MacDonald,
But their owner's name is Duck.

With his profit net,
Duck will pay the vet.
He'll keep his mallards strong,
And it won't be very long
Till another record's set.

This is a swimming race.
The ducks have lots of grace.
They never get discouraged.
Betting may be encouraged
When they're near your place.

In this ducky sport
The course is rather short
And the pace defies belief.
So a race is very brief
According to report.

I'd like to write a ballad
About Duck's racing mallards.
And I would do it too
If I only knew
Whether they like salad.

PRESIDENT SMITH

When this job is offered you,
You have to think it through.
The president of a college
That dispenses needed knowledge
Has important work to do.

I think the school's in luck
To have this man called Buck.
There's very little doubt
He knows what he's about.
If not, with him they're stuck.

POWER AND ENERGY

Of energy I have a lot.
It's my power that is shot.
In my shuffling style
I jog many a mile,
But my speed is not so hot.

VELCRO WALL INFLATABLE

On the inflatable I like best of all
Kids can have a ball.
Of pleasure they're in pursuit
When they wear a Velcro suit
And are thrown against the wall.

Recreation is well served;
It doesn't take much nerve,
And here's what's really slick:
You can leave 'em up there stick
When they get on your nerves.

BLUE GRASS CONCERT

The crowd was so enthusiastic
'Cause the band was so fantastic!
For sure, that can happen
When the music is toe-tappin'.
'Twas, of course, blue grastic.

PROFESSOR KLEINROCK

Scott found it rather neat
And I'm sure it was a treat
When he received an e-mail
From him who sent the first e-mail.
And Kleinrock he will meet.

MOTHER AND DAUGHTER

Strange this is but true:
I have a dear friend who
Is an honorary daughter of me
And yet is simultaneously
My honorary mother too!

GREENBANK

Electronic noise is a worry
At the radio observatory.
Wirelss Internet is a source of that.
Greenbank is where it's at.
Do you know its story?

HARD TASKS

About all hard tasks everywhere,
This I would like to share:
The hardest part
Is to make a start.
Then it's all downhill from there.

HEALTH

Be thankful if you can do
The things you love to do.
If you have your health,
It's a greater wealth
Than of gold a whole slew.

DESSERT FIRST

While not looking for the worst,
Yet knowing a bomb could burst
And that tragedy can befall
Even at a ball,
Eat your dessert first.